The Coffee-Mate Crook

Boy, oh boy, is mom pissed!

Some cheapskate at work has been dipping into her liquid Coffee-Mate. Despite a sign on the refrigerator door in the break room requesting people not to steal food, a cretinous coworker managed to consume a 32oz. bottle of mom’s caffeine creamer in less than a week. As if that’s not bad enough, the pilferer stuck the empty bottle back in the refrigerator.

When the woman in the next cubicle was missing money from her desk, mom thought the cleaning crew was to blame. Now, she’s inclined to believe there’s a serious klepto on the loose on her floor; someone who doesn’t balk at filching food or drink.

Mom’s hit upon a plan to deter the Coffee-Mate crook. She’s going to stock the refrigerator with a feeding bottle filled with Coffee-Mate but labeled BREAST MILK. If the bottle’s still tampered with, mom’s going to presume the culprit is a perverted male colleague.

She hopes the feeding bottle will be left alone because, frankly, she has no other bright ideas.

Perhaps you can help.